Can’t wait to clean!! DAY 12
Jul 20, 2018
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y9S7r4SdRws

hope everybody is having a wonderful
morning so far for me I am I have been
kind of chillaxing I've been putting
aloe vera on my rat on my rash God on my
burn the Sun just ate me alive it I
normally normally I don't burn so I
don't know if this is partly sunn but
I'm wondering if some of it is winburn I
don't know if that's possible I don't
know I mean it wasn't that windy though
but I just don't normally burn like this
like and if I'm gonna if I go on in the
Sun literally I can tan within 10
minutes I can come in and have a huge
dark tan line where I just hand my skin
has just always been that way but as
I've gotten older I've noticed that the
Sun hasn't really tanned me as much so
just burns me um so I'm not sure why I
don't know if my skin is just the maybe
the complexion is kind of lightened up
and maybe the Sun just eats at me more
so I've been kind of putting coal
presses on cuz it really hurts I mean
especially down here when it moves it's
like I don't want to really talk very
much cuz it hurts but with my kids they
don't care they're like I need to talk
to your mom and if you don't answer it's
me until you do so I'm like what um
anyway so otherwise it's just been kind
of a relaxed day I have been doing my
walking every single two hours and in
fact today I actually bumped it up to 20
times and so instead of just going back
well I was doing 10 times of my for my
living room to my hallway and it's a
it's a good distance like I said I will
show you guys um here soon I'll show you
the distance of it I mean I feel a
difference when I'm walking it like my
body is just like out of breath a little
bit so I've been doing 10 but I told
ollie last night I was like you know I'm
starting
kind of comfortable the 10 like it's not
affecting me like it was at the very
beginning so I said I think you know
when I'm think I'm gonna bump it up to
20
Wow 20 makes a difference I was just
like what um sorry I drink cups
sparkling water before I came to welcome
you guys or came to greet you guys um so
anyways uh what was I saying
yes so I bumped it up to 20 and wow what
a difference like my thighs are kind of
burning a little bit and my heart rate
is up there just a little bit and I'm a
little huffing and puffing I'm like wow
20 minutes or 20 times and so my goal is
to get tough going 50 times back and
forth and then once I get to 50 I think
that I'll be able to start going outside
and doing the walking it's just right
now I mean I I wouldn't make it very far
to make it worth really going outside to
do it at this point especially with the
heat so I'm just kind of paying
attention to how my body's feeling and I
do push myself past my comfort zone like
I am NOT gonna lie I push myself because
I know in the end
yes I'm uncomfortable at that moment but
then once I sit down and I'm catching my
breath and letting my body rest for a
little bit it's like wow I accomplished
going back and forth 20 times when at
the beginning of all of this I couldn't
even go from my chair to the bathroom
without being so out of breath that I
just like sat there and just huffed and
puffed and couldn't catch my breath and
my heartbeat was racing and that's crazy
but yeah so it's a great feeling anyways
to know that I'm making it 20 times back
and forth and now I can get up to go to
for my chair to the bathroom to take a
shower come back into my bedroom and
then that's when I'm starting to get a
little bit out of breath but before it
was it was hard so just in two weeks I
can definitely tell the difference in my
activity level and the alittle mint
a bit amount of activity that I am
making myself do every single day is
definitely paying off because I am
feeling a difference I've only done the
weights two times this week so far I
will do them tomorrow and then and so
what I do is every single day every two
hours I walk and then three times a week
I'm gonna do the dumbbells and the
stretchy band and the only reason why
I'm gonna do it like that is cuz I don't
want to overdo my muscles and then hurt
myself somewhere because I'm just not
used to even doing much of anything much
less lifting stuff and so and we can't
find my one pound dumbbells they're in
here somewhere because I have from one
pound up to five pounds and then I have
sitting right here I have a ten pound
what are those think cowbells I think
they're called I have a ten pound one of
those and then I have more that go up
from there and then I have like boxing
gloves which eventually I want to start
doing a little bit of boxing with my
husband because that also will help
strengthen a lot of my body so there's a
lot of excitement in the amount of
activity that I'm gonna start being able
to start really putting into my body and
start feeling really good because
everything that I'm doing I know is just
gonna make me that much closer to me my
goal and so yeah but what do you guys do
for low impact type of exercising
movement what are some suggestions maybe
you guys have that I haven't talked
about that maybe I might be able to use
as an idea because you know there's only
so much you can think of for yourself
and I've done some googling and you know
I'm putting in what I can but sometimes
people have better suggestions that have
worked for them so if you guys have any
ideas let me know in the comments or
email me and tell me because I would
love to see what you guys are doing as
well and then the other thing I was
thinking today was I got a catalogue for
Tory
and I was like oh I hate those come out
because then it's like you're knowing
that the next set of clothing line is
coming out so you're like your fingers
start burning your mind starts turning
you're thinking what can I get now and
so I've been thinking like we're gonna
be getting into winter here within the
next probably two and a half months
which seems so far away but really it's
not it's not an IBA okay to pass up some
of this heat just a little uh so anyways
I'm just really excited to see what the
winter line is gonna bring me and
somebody had asked me the other day what
is my favorite clothing line for me
personally I used to do lame Brian but
here was my trick so I was in 26-28
before I bloomed up and Lane Bryant
should close the regular clothes they
were always too short for my comfort and
they really weren't big enough for me
because I don't like my clothes really
tight I like to have some breathing
space some room and so what I would do
is I would go on to there I don't want
to say it wrong classique chic you know
what I'm talking about I hope but the
pajama side and a lot of their jammies
you could wear as clothes and you would
never know in a million years that they
were pajamas and they would go to 26-28
but because they're pajamas they be made
a little bit bigger so sometimes they
would have like their they weren't maxi
dresses but they were lounge dresses but
you can use them as a maxi dress and
just their pajama shirts and pants and
capris and all of that I would buy those
and that's what I would wear as outfits
well because of that some women had
asked me a while back when I don't know
where I was out I was somewhere and they
were like oh my god where'd you get that
outfit is so cute and I was like Lane
Bryant and they're like really we've
never seen that one I was like well it's
in their pajama section and they're like
what they're like we would never think
that that's a jammie and I'm like mm-hmm
well lo and behold the next time I went
in there cuz Lane Bryant pretty much
knew me like toward now knows me pretty
much my name and bi-phase and so when I
had went in there one of the cashiers
was like Amy you would have no idea
what's going on lately and I'm like what
and she's like all of a sudden we've had
quite a few people coming in and buying
our jammies and so excited because
they're gonna make them into clothes
like we're a mess outfits and I'm like
okay I didn't know I had anything to do
with it and she's like well some people
were like we never thought about it like
we just never thought that we could use
it as an outfit well then come to find
out a couple of the workers started
doing it too because they're like well
we fit better in the jammies and we do
our own clothes so I thought that was
pretty cool um so that's what I would do
when I would go to Lane Bryant but then
I don't know what started me shopping at
torrid but for some reason I went to
torrid and I found a couple things and I
absolutely fell in love with their sizes
because they go up to size six which six
I want to say what toward is thirty
thirty-two
I believe don't mark me to it but I
think that's what it is and so anyways
there I can buy their actual real
clothes and not just their jammies and I
get to wear regular clothes like
everybody else and they fit me great so
that is why I have actually went from
Lane Bryant a torrid and pretty much I
think their prices are pretty good I
mean they are expensive now don't get me
wrong they are spendy but what plus-size
store really doesn't have spinning
I mean Catherine's you can spend a good
50 60 even 70 dollars sometimes on a
shirt they're my panties that I bought
before I got pregnant with my son they
were 15 dollars a piece now I still have
them
they never fell apart now I will say
towards underwears suck I don't like
them I got a few pair and they were so
cute and I was so excited because I
finally got some sexy panties and I
think I wore him like three times and by
the third time the lace was like all
ripping up and torn and I'm like what
the heck and so I end up happy to throw
all three pairs away which really upset
me because I spent like I want to say
anywhere from 10 to 15 dollars per pair
of underwear and I just yeah that was
not I was not very happy with that but
on the other note I did get some really
cute clothes and that's where I really
get a lot of my stuff is from there
because I fit well I feel comfortable
and the women that work at toured here
in the mall they're so amazing they're
so nice and my husband a lot of times
bless his little heart he'll go and do
my returns as something doesn't fit
because I do a lot of online shopping
right now because again my walking has
been so hard on me that walking through
the mall is just like not really a
possibility right now it will be here
soon but so I do a lot of online
shopping but if my husband needs to go
and pick up my stuff or whatever he
always goes in and does it for me so
they know him by face and when I talk to
the workers it's so funny because I'll
call to see if my packages are in or
whatever and they're like oh yes Amy
hold on and then I'm like it's so funny
because you guys know me by like my
voice of my name and she's like I know
we've never seen you but we know your
husband by face like as soon as he walks
in we know it's for Amy and I just died
because I was like oh my god how
embarrassing my poor husband walks into
a woman shop and they all know him I'm
sure he just loves it but yeah I just
that's the store
I really like his lane Bryant um I've
never had an issue with anything other
than their underwear that is the one and
only thing I will complain about it is
their panties
I haven't done their bras only because I
don't wear those kind of bras I just
wear sports bras it's the most
comfortable for me I love them and
that's just what I've always worn so
that's what I've stopped - and one other
will I've done Catherine's too but I
don't really find much with Catherine's
I find Catherine's is a lot like Lane
Bryant in some ways they do go out to
bigger sizes but the problem with
Catherine's is that they're their shirts
are way too short for me again I am very
self-conscious of my bottom stomach that
comes out and I feel like I have to hunt
hung I have to hide that junk because I
don't like it and I'm starting to come
around where I have to be a little bit
more secure with myself and if it's
showing a little bit you know that it's
not the end of the world but I mean
seriously I would wear shirts down past
my knees if I had to because that's just
how I feel more secure but I'm working
on that is a work in progress but
Catherine's shirts just don't cover me
the way that I would want them to cover
me so firm that I don't I don't feel
comfortable now like this shirt that I
have on it is a cami so it's just a tank
top cami um these ones are Catherine's
I've got a green one I've got the bright
pink one bright blue one I think those
are the colors I have and those actually
go up to 5 5 X but again they are short
so they fit me but they're short so I
would never wear it with a like a
cardigan over it and just leave my house
now around my house definitely I would
wear you know whatever because I have no
problem with that but going out in
public I would never be caught wearing
just my cami with a shirt like a little
sweater over it because it would never
cover me the way I want to
so anyways enough with my morning
rambling go ahead and if you would
we share what stores you guys like and
what deals you guys find again that
would be amazing because maybe there's
online stores that I don't even know
about my biggest fear with online
shopping if I don't know the store or
it's not an easy return is sometimes you
get into those stores that are from like
China and stuff which I don't have a
problem buying from there obviously but
sometimes their sizes are way off so you
can buy something that says it's a 5 6 X
you get it and it's more like a 2 or 3 X
so I just don't want to waste my money
just going and buying something that's
definitely not gonna fit but if there is
stuff that is true to size please let me
know because I would love to go and
check different things out and buy
different things and show you guys
different styles and stuff that would be
so much fun so anyways I will let you
guys get back to your mornings but I
will check in again soon here stay tuned
all of my breakfasts and lunches have
been repeats for the last couple of days
because it's easy to keep my calorie
count down and be able just to know
what's on the menu makes it a lot easier
for me and my hubby so it's just all
repeats today enjoy the pictures
good evening so today was just it was
not a very active day I did do all my
exercises that I was supposed to do
today by my walking but I didn't go
anywhere today I stayed home in my house
closed all day I had zero amount of
energy to want to go outside I I think
yesterday at the beach and getting the
Sun Tan or Sun Tan
Sun Tan I wish this burn I mean
seriously still I'm having a really hard
time putting my glasses on because it
just like sitting on him ooh it hurts
but I like to see - so anyways I really
just kind of stuck around the house and
did some editing and did some studying
because when I bring you guys sometimes
you know ending indeed night
conversation sometimes those
conversations need a little bit of
backup and so I like to study sometimes
when there is something that I'm like oh
I think I you know I think that this is
something that I'm gonna talk about
tonight sometimes I'll look things up
you know to help in that conversation
with you guys cuz I want the best
knowledge that I can as I'm sharing
things from personal views but also from
other views from other people so I did a
little bit of studying today and just
really sat back today and just reread a
lot of my messages and every time I read
my messages I get just a little more
message from what you guys are sending
me and it just fills me with so much joy
and so much happiness to see so much
support and today I was kinda having a
little bit about
day at one point because I just you know
I was really kind of struggling with the
topic of when you do so much for people
and it's not that I expect in return
that's that's not it
I do things out of the kindness of my
heart but sometimes getting a return of
support or encouragement sometimes is
all that's needed and when you lack that
from people that you would expect to be
kind of there to hold your hand in the
same situation it's a little sometimes
discouraging but you know what I saw and
I talked with Olli tonight and or today
and he just reminded me of all of you
guys and just reminded me of how amazing
every one of you guys are and that's all
that matters anybody that doesn't want
to show support or encouragement or just
doesn't really want to join the journey
it's okay it's really okay because I've
got so many more amazing new friends to
share this excitement with and for you
guys to share your excitement with me
that in reality all of that other stuff
just doesn't weigh anything compared to
what you guys do so it really kind of
checked me out of my funk real quick
like I was just like you're right like
why am I even wasting one dull moment of
negativity in my mind when I've got so
many awesome people rallying with me and
we are such an amazing community of
people why would I waste even five
minutes of discouragement when I've got
so much more positive so I checked out
of that real quick and so we just kind
of just sat around today and did some
talking and just had a really good lazy
day I guess you would call otherwise
other than like I said I did do my
exercise but it was all inside the house
so it was nice um
and then let's see what else did we do
well we did laundry and so what are kind
of our roles are is so my husband does
the laundry part and then my son will
bring the laundry from the dryer
you know we pile it up on the couch
because with five of us I swear it seems
like we're doing laundry every day like
it seems in my daughter she's a little
diva and she needs to change her clothes
like seriously four and five and six
times a day and I'm just like do you
know what this is doing to us it's not
that we don't want the washer clothes
but my goodness and we have to change
him because I swear it's like every
outfit she puts on she's got to eat
something so then it's got something on
it so it's like okay it's dirty then
even though you just put it on 10
minutes ago it's dirty so we're
constantly seeming to be doing laundry
our heating element I think it's finally
taking a nosedive was kind of hoping
that that wasn't the case my husband
told me I don't even know like last week
he's like honey I think the heating
element might be going out so we called
a couple places and we found a really
good deal and then he came home and he
cleaned the vent which he said literally
he could have probably made a blanket
with it was that thick and I'm like babe
like when was the last time that that
vent was clean he's like oh no I'm like
oh my god I'm like honey you pretty much
have to change something like every
single day that you're doing the laundry
he's like I don't know just like it's
such a it's such an easy sorry guys it's
such an easy
oops to forget and I'm like oh no for
sure I mean I've done it millions of
times but we thought that that was the
issue because it kind of seemed like the
dryer was starting to work again like
drying the clothes because it works but
sometimes it'll take two or three cycles
for it to actually like dry stuff we
don't really do big loads just because I
don't I feel like clothes get cleaner
when you do a little bit less of a load
on a full load of like water I guess I
don't know how to describe it but
anyways um
so we thought we had it fixed and then
like two days ago he's like babe I think
that elements going out because it's
still not doing what it's supposed to
I'm like my kool-aid so now we are gonna
have to make some calls tomorrow and to
go back to the people that we found a
really good deal they're gonna come out
and take the element out that's in there
and put the new heating element in so
it's not tube I mean it's cheaper than
going to buying a brand new dryer and
right now I just I'm like no I don't
want to buy a new dryer like we looked
at Costco and I didn't really shop
around much because I really am NOT an
innie position right now that I want to
buy a dryer like i mean we could if we
wanted to but I really don't want to no
I want to buy other things adult teen is
hard sometimes so anyway so the the
cycle that we do is my husband husband
puts the clothes in the washer and then
my husband and then my son will take him
from the washer to the dryer and then he
brings them and put piles it up on the
couch and then I fold all of the laundry
and get it all put together and then my
husband puts it all away and then we
just take like little turns on things
and of course I kind of do more of the
easier things that are not so physical
because of course it hurts right now but
I do the best I can but I was sitting in
there today and I was like you know what
I would give right now to stand up and
really go and clean my kitchen and clean
the bathrooms and clean all the bedrooms
and clean everything all at one shot and
clean my whole house by myself and I
really thought about it notes like gosh
you know sometimes people take those
things for granted because you know I
mean not everybody has that problem that
they can't and for me I have always been
a neat freak like I like my house a
certain way all the time sometimes my
husband's like oh my god
ah because he hates that I'm so
particular I like things in their place
I don't like dust building up I like my
counters cleaned off I mean that's just
me and he'll be like oh my gosh you're
such a neat Frank I can't see me right
and I'm like I can't stand cluttered I
can't stand dirt and mess so I was
sitting there tonight and I told him I
said you know I am so excited that I'm
finally gonna be able to take that torch
back and I'm finally gonna be able to
take my role back that I personally
enjoyed which was cleaning the house I
loved doing it before but as I was
putting on more weight and more weight
and more weight then my body started to
break down so it became very hard to do
those household chores that were simple
but very difficult for me and so he's
just like he's like honey I will always
be there to help clean for you you know
with you and I'm like but that's not
what I want
I was like you know if you weren't
having to be so worried about cleaning
the house and stuff you could be out
doing other things you could be working
on the yard you can humble which he does
but you know our poor yard probably
could use it can we use some work but
you know my poor husband can't be spread
all over the place and of course he you
know he does his ultimate best with
keeping the house the way that he knows
I like it but he's a man and men don't
always of course do it to a woman's
aspects but I love him to death because
he does his very best and my son is such
an amazing little boy because he I've
always taught my kids and this was
before I wasn't really able to clean but
from the age of four he started having
little chores whether it be you know at
first it was picking up your laundry
from your floor and putting it in the
laundry room and you know helping I'm
not a stickler about oh you got to make
your bed because I just was never really
taught that it was an important thing I
I know that it is because it's just a
fresh start to your day but
I really was never really strict about
that but you know you pick up your toys
you put him away you know you take your
dishes from the table and you put him in
the sink that was just starting at 4 and
then at 5 he was introduced to the
vacuum which he was just a static he
thought that was the best job now now
it's like okay it's vacuum time he's
like ha ha ha I'm like what happened
when you were excited about it but you
know so we I've started very young with
my kids that you all have to pitch in
like we all have to pitch in and even
though I can't do everything right now I
still find things that I can do to help
the load a little bit because anything
is better than nothing and I'm not just
gonna sit there and watch my family do
everything well you know I get to just
sit with my legs up in there and do
nothing and I feel guilty when I even
have to stop doing something because my
back is killing me I feel so bad because
I'm just like if I could just keep going
but sometimes the pain is just so bad I
can't handle it and I'll be like
trembling because of my pain is so bad
but I can honestly say today I really
rocked it with my walking I was so happy
when I kept going and going and going I
was just like oh my gosh you know of
course my back was kind of getting a
little sore but I was like nope you're
gonna keep going to me because it's just
gonna pay off you are gonna keep doing
this and I'll still have one more walk
to do before I go to bed tonight because
I want to try and do one more before bed
and then start fresh again
in the morning but anyways yeah it was a
really kind of just a down relaxed day
just kind of catch up on some small
small chores my eating kind of it's open
kind of repeat so I really didn't think
to take pictures because I'm just a
figure and you guys probably know what
I'm but my pictures are gonna be as I
tell you so for breakfast I just saw my
normal breakfast sandwich lunch
I didn't eat really anything I had well
I had a beef jerky and then about two
hours later I told my husband I told
Holly I was like I'm just not feeling
very good like I my stomach's kind of
bothering me and I just like I'm just I
don't know I like I don't have much
energy and he's like how much have you
eaten and so I told him he's like no no
no he's like Amy you need to eat a
little something more to get a little
bit more you know in your body to keep
you going so I ended up having a yogurt
with a little bit of granola and not
really helped me that actually piped me
up quite a bit and then for dinner I
just again how to repeat chicken salad I
swear I can live on those things so
that's what I end up having I did have
my Dutch today
oli went and got me my Dutch brothers
because I didn't feel like going with
him so he's like well I'll just bring
home for you and I'm like oh thank you
and then so why I like I told you guys
at the beginning of this whole journey
sometimes women and our dynamics change
things a little bit well my dynamic
showed up today after not having my
dynamic for four months so I am just
hoping that it doesn't affect what
Saturday's routines are gonna be but I
know normally when it says hello it
usually puts about four to five pounds
on me so because of fluid so I'm really
hoping that it doesn't affect my
weigh-in but if it does it's okay I know
that it's because of what's going on
because I know I know personally that
I've been logging everything and keeping
complete 100% attention to what I'm
eating and choosing to put in my mouth
so if there is an adjustment to my
weight I know why and it just stinks
it's like but you know honestly almost
immediately when it happened I felt like
my mood changed and
I don't know is that normal maybe
somebody can answer that for me is that
normal when something like that when it
shows up that you kind of like your body
releases or something like I just felt
like a sense of like relief almost but
in my mood I don't know it was really
weird I don't really know how to
describe it but yeah so anyways I was
gonna give you guys a heads up on that
and then I again I failed on my weight
loss chart but my wonderful mr. Olli so
that tomorrow I get a little bit of me
time so I get to sit and do that for a
little bit so I'm really excited because
it's something I need to get done
because I want to get it done and then I
want to share it with you guys so that's
why I'm like working so hard to get this
finished so I'll work on that tomorrow
so that I could show you guys and other
than that that's pretty much how my day
went I really didn't do a whole lot like
I said so but it was a wonderful day I
really had a good time and we had some
good family time that's what was
much-needed and we really we really did
need just a day to stay in the house and
just have some downtime like we I feel
like we're always on the go so having a
down day is just it's nice it really is
nice so anyways I hope you guys had an
amazing Thursday and I will see you guys
again tomorrow
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